It’s tough out there for the geek boys.

Except, not really. 

"I also wanted Clea and me to get married to promote the movie. But she wouldn’t do it." [x]

(Source: vitawoolf)


"F-ace-ing Silence" issue 2— Call for Submissions:

People on the asexual spectrum have been working hard to get non-asexual folks to recognise that we exist. And sometimes they do. But that means there’s a dominant narrative… we’re just like idealised “normal/healthy” people, but without the sexual attraction part.

People have been talking a lot lately about how and why that discourse is a problem. But that hasn’t done much to stop our ace communities from silencing people: we’re still not supposed to talk about how our asexuality is mixed up with the other parts of our experiences and identities that don’t fit the “normal/healthy” ideal.

  • What asexuality-related thing do you feel silenced about in asexual / ace communities?      and / or

  • Do you feel alone, alienated or confused about how to deal with some asexuality-related thing because there doesn’t really seem to be anyone talking about it in aces spaces?

  • And what do you have to say about it?

Words, images… anything that can be printed on regular letter-sized (8.5”x11”) printer paper— and contributions can be anonymous if that’s what you prefer.

Preliminary Deadline: October 15, 2014 
(will be extended if people need more time— please let me know if you need more time)

Please e-mail contributions, questions, comments, etc. to:
rotten [dot] zucchinis [at] gmail.com

"News broke yesterday that nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence had been “leaked” online. The truth is they were stolen. They were hacked from her personal technology. They were posted online without her consent. This is a crime. And possibly worst of all, this is something women are supposed to expect… We live in a society where women’s bodies are a commodity to be sold, whether they agree to it or not. And some of the same people who complain about the NSA or Facebook invading their personal privacy will be the same people searching and spreading around these photos."

Large-Scale Hack Lands Stolen Nude Photos Of Jennifer Lawrence & Other Celebrities Online | The Mary Sue (via themarysue)

Remember when those paparazzi shot photos up Anne Hathaway’s skirt? And everyone said “well, she should have been wearing underwear,” as if it was their business? As if what we wear *under* our clothes or put on our private cell phones or computers is anyone’s right to know about or see?

These are sex crimes, people. Wake up.

(via bookoisseur)




In July I shared a story of an incident in which my city’s police stormed a man’s house looking for drugs in the middle of the night and executed his two (understandably startled) dogs. One of the dogs was shot to death while fleeing in fear, and as I noted then, this isn’t an isolated incident. Just a few years ago, the Saint Paul Police killed another family dog…and forced handcuffed children to sit next to its bleeding corpse. The kicker? The raid wasn’t even in the right house!

Now, a new report has surfaced of SPPD brutality. This time, a young father named Chris Lollie was arrested while waiting to pick up his kids from school. The charges wereTrespassing, Disorderly Conduct, and Obstructing Legal Process,” and police claimed he refused to leave an area reserved for employees of the bank building he was in. However, not only were there no signs indicating that the location was private, but Lollie wasn’t even in the bank proper; he was in the skyway.

(For those who aren’t familiar with the skyway system, it’s a thing we have in St. Paul, Minneapolis, and some other Minnesota cities. Basically, it gets hella cold here in the winter, so they built enclosed sidewalks, or skyways, one or two stories up. In the downtown areas, the skyways form a whole second network of pedestrian roads, and once you get inside your office building—or whichever building is closest to your parking garage or bus stop or whatever—you can use them to move from building to building to get around the whole downtown area. It’s an easy way to go to lunch or meetings without having the snot in your nostrils freeze. I mention all that to say: Skyways are public spaces. You do not have to be an employee in the buildings they connect to use them. Lollie was not trespassing.)

Fortunately, Lollie had the presence of mind to capture his interaction with the SPPD on film. Here’s a transcript I’ve made of the first few seconds:

Lollie: So what’s your business with me right now?

Officer: I want to find out who you are, and what the problem was back there…

Lollie: There is no problem—that’s the thing.

Officer: So, talk to me, let me know, and you can be on your way.

Lollie: Let you know…why do I have to let you know who I am? Who I am isn’t the problem.

Officer: Because that’s what police do when they get called.

Lollie: Well, I know my rights, first off. Secondly, I don’t have to let you know who I am if I haven’t broken any laws. Like I told him, I’m going to New Horizons [School] to pick up my kids at 10 o’clock. I was sitting there for ten minutes…

As the officer brushes aside his explanation and continues to illegally demand he identify himself, Lollie cuts to the chase: “The problem is I’m black. That’s the problem. No, it really is, because I didn’t do anything wrong.”

Next, Lollie and the female officer he’s been walking and talking with meet a male officer. When Lollie politely asks the officer not to touch or obstruct him, because he has to go get his kids, the man immediately responds, “Well, you’re going to go to jail then.”

As the police initiate the arrest process—telling him to put his hand behind his back or “otherwise things are going to get ugly"—the camera visuals go black. Lollie continues to be heard pleading, still polite even while he’s assaulted, that he be allowed to go meet his children.

Next, they tase him.

If that’s not enough to convince you that this is gross police misconduct, seriously, take five minutes and watch the video. The calmness of his tone alone should make it obvious that there is no possible argument that the situation merited this kind of police action:

After multiple witnesses verified Lollie’s version of events, prosecutors dropped all charges against him. One woman who is also not an employee at the bank the skyway links noted that she regularly sits during her lunch break exactly where Lollie was sitting, but she has never been harassed by police. However, the SPPD continue to defend their actions.

At The Atlantic, Conor Friedersdorf points out how simple it would have been for police to resolve this situation without violence and an arrest had they cared to do so:

His story about getting his kids wasn’t merely plausible, given the man’s age and the fact that there was a school right there–it was a story the female police officer shown at the beginning of the video or the male officer shown later could easily confirm. 

Lollie is also absolutely correct that no law required him to show an ID to police officers. As Flex Your Rights explains, “Police can never compel you to identify yourself without reasonable suspicion to believe you’re involved in illegal activity,” and while 24 states have passed “stop and identify” statutes “requiring citizens to reveal their identity when officers have reasonable suspicion to believe criminal activity may be taking place,” Minnesota isn’t one of those states.

The female officer shown in the beginning of the video could easily have de-escalated the encounter by saying, “You’re right, sir, you have every right to refuse to show me identification, and if you’re just picking up your kids I’m so sorry to have bothered you. If you don’t mind, I just want to walk with you to confirm that your story checks out so I can inform the 911 caller of their error. That way we can make sure this never happens again when you’re just here to pick up your kids.”

Or she could’ve said, “Sir, I totally see why this is confusing–a lot of people would think so. Let me try to explain. That totally looks like a public seating area, but it’s actually private. Don’t you think they should have a sign saying so? Calling me may seem like an overreaction, but technically they can ask you to leave. You’re walking away now, so there’s actually no problem as long as you’re not going to go back. Are you? Okay, then we have no problem, have a wonderful day.”  

As Lollie is carried away post-tasing, he can be heard challenging the officers’ “legal” assault: "Who are you? You don’t rule me. I didn’t do anything wrong. I didn’t hurt anybody. I didn’t touch anybody."

If only the SPPD could honestly say the same.

That video that was being passed around yesterday



Me in the library


When all bodies are recognized as worthy bodies of care. 

This image includes a pull quote from my acceptance speech at Planned Parenthood’s excellence in media awards luncheon, where I was recognized for creating the tumblr, I Am #RedefiningRealness

(Source: millsthrills)

I had a dream last night that I came out to my parents as ace/aro, and my mom didn’t take it very well. She started crying and talking about Jesus and saying that would change when I met the right person or some nonsense. 

& dad looked up stuff on AVEN and tried to explain things to mom, but he wouldn’t do it because he didn’t care or wanted to be supportive, he’d do it because he likes to understand things… which is fine because it’s better than preaching at me or crying about me. 

But in my dream my sister was with me? & she let me stay with her for the rest of the time I was in Texas because I didn’t want to deal with mom. & we went out & got really drunk together.